I Should Be Able To Do This Myself
(Should you?)
A couple of weeks ago, I had a beautiful weekend away in Orewa.
Sun, sea air, a change of scenery. Exactly the kind of reset that reminds you why stepping away from work occasionally matters.
But on the drive home, my car had what I can only describe as a small meltdown.
Something clearly wasn’t right. It struggled to accelerate and wouldn’t go faster than about 20km/h.
Now, I have absolutely no idea what was actually wrong with it. I’m not a mechanic.
But I do know this:
When your car can’t go faster than 20km/h, you probably shouldn’t try to diagnose it yourself on the side of the road.
So, first thing Monday morning, I took it to the Murray at Ansin & Montieth and asked him to take a look.
No one was surprised by this decision.
No one said, “Shouldn’t you at least try to fix it yourself first?”
It was simply the sensible thing to do.
Which got me thinking.
Because in business, we often operate under a very different set of expectations.
The “I Should Be Able to Do This Myself” Story
I hear this sentence from business owners all the time:
“I should be able to figure this out myself.”
Whether it’s strategy, pricing, growth decisions, leadership challenges, or simply feeling stuck in the day-to-day grind, there’s this quiet pressure to solve it alone.
We seem to have decided there are acceptable areas to ask for help.
We happily work with:
Accountants
Lawyers
Mechanics
Personal trainers
IT support
But when it comes to running the business itself, many people feel like they’re supposed to just… know.
Know the strategy.
Know the next move.
Know how to fix things when they stall.
And if they don’t?
They assume they should work harder until they do.
But Business Isn’t a Solo Sport
Running a business means making decisions in conditions that are often messy and uncertain.
You’re balancing:
Revenue and sustainability
Team dynamics
Client expectations
Long-term direction
Your own energy and capacity
That’s a lot for one brain to hold on its own.
The irony is that the most capable business owners are often the ones who feel this pressure the most. They’re used to being resourceful. Capable. Independent.
So the default becomes:
“I’ll figure it out.”
But sometimes the smartest move isn’t pushing harder.
Sometimes it’s bringing in perspective.
Support Is Strategy
When my car stopped working properly, I didn’t lose confidence in my ability to drive.
I simply recognised that diagnosing and repairing engines isn’t my area of expertise.
The same principle applies in business.
Getting support doesn’t mean you’re incapable.
It means you’re serious about moving forward.
Sometimes what people need isn’t another course, system, or spreadsheet.
What they actually need is space to think properly.
To step back from the day-to-day noise.
To talk things through with someone who can see the patterns they’re too close to notice.
Because clarity often appears faster when you’re not trying to carry everything alone.
Something I see often in my work with business owners is the shift that happens when they finally have space to think properly.
A client I worked with recently came into a session feeling quite stressed. She had an upcoming event she needed to design and deliver, but we had spent the previous couple of weeks focusing on sales. Now that the event was approaching, she was itching to get into the details.
As she talked, I listened to the ideas she had for the session and the journey she wanted to take participants on.
We started mapping everything up on the whiteboard.
Piece by piece the ideas came together into a clear structure for the four-hour event. We created a lovely balance of education and practical exercises so people wouldn’t just learn something new, they’d experience it.
And as the plan came together, something else shifted too.
Her energy changed.
You could see the excitement building as the event moved from a cloud of ideas into something real and achievable.
She left the session with clarity on what she was going to deliver, the confidence that she could pull it off, and the energy to go and make it happen.
That’s often what strategic support creates.
Not magic.
Not a complicated framework.
Just space, perspective, and a clear path forward.
A Different Question to Ask
Instead of asking:
“Should I be able to do this myself?”
A better question might be:
“What support would help me make better decisions here?”
Business owners don’t have to solve everything alone.
And just like with a car that won’t go faster than 20km/h, sometimes the most sensible thing to do is ask someone who understands the system to take a look.
So if you find yourself thinking:
“I should be able to do this myself.”
Pause for a moment and ask a different question.
What support would help me see this more clearly?
Sometimes the problem isn’t that the engine is broken.
You’re just too close to the dashboard to see what’s happening under the bonnet.
If you’d like space to step back, think clearly, and work through what’s next for your business, you can book a Clarity Call with me.
Sometimes an hour of focused conversation is all it takes to turn fog into forward motion.
